Each week I do a live broadcast on Facebook based on a custom built cut-up poem and two tarot cards. This is the condensed notes from the week’s transmission for the week beginning Monday 29th April. The original poem is available for purchase here for $15 including postage.
We have well-established practices and habits for locking away our pain, our trauma and our wounding. We rationalise and logic it away. We decide we don’t have time to deal with it. Or the resources or skills to do so. We don’t have the people around us who would understand or who might be able to help us. Or we just outright try to forget.
And then there comes a time when we can no longer ignore the lack of ease within because it manifest outwards and demands our attention. It is no accident that disease is also dis-ease; our body’s way of communicating that something is not right.
The poem suggests a grab for the throat. In this case, we get throat infections we can’t seem to shake or lose our voices. Or there’s a construction in our throat or a perpetual dry itch. We have bouts of breathlessness or feel as though we can’t breath. As though we are suffocating. In this case, the time may have come to speak out; to refuse to be silenced any more.
It may manifest elsewhere in your body. The areas of my body ruled by the third and first chakras are usually on my heart and soul’s hit list with what it is trying to alchemise.
The second stanza is a reminder of the grief and distress which comes, not just with the actual physical pain, but with the opening of spaces we thought we could get by denying, forgetting or pretending we were okay with.
The third stanza – for me – talks of a homecoming. To return to our bodies. To return to all the places we have forgotten we fit within ourselves. Less like matryoshkas and more like a kintsugi pot being reassembled so our fractures are healed with precious metal and we become something beautiful in our pain and our healing. We don’t hide the places we have been hurt or broken; they become part of the wonder and beauty of the fabric of our being. We no longer ascribe shame to these parts of ourselves. We embrace ourselves as one precious whole.
The final stanza is an invitation to return to yourself through touch. Where the perfect expectation of yourself meets the imperfect projections you have also created in the reality of the flesh and are all welcomed in, and loved. In truth, every part of you, and yourself as a whole, is perfect for where you are in this moment. Skin-to-skin you remember this.
THE KNIGHT OF PENTACLES
The Knight of Pentacles is slowly moving. He progresses with single-minded focus and determination. He can be relied on to get things done. This is the energy the mind/ego has enlisted to help shut away pain. The Knight of Pentacles is reliable and trustworthy at whatever he throws his weight behind. And it’s the same energy you are able to call on to embrace all parts of yourself and begin the journey of integrating all of you into your body, through releasing, healing, loving and accepting your body.
The Knight is also a reminder of the beauty and power of small simple steps toward a goal. Of daily practices that help to ground and heal. We may not suddenly love ourselves with a fiery bonfire passion of a first attraction and that’s okay. Self love, self acceptance and physical healing to wellness take time. They take effort, time and commitment. We are asked to put one foot (literally) in front of the other, over and over again.
What daily practices can you enlist, that require less than 5 minutes of your time, that included skin-on-skin time and invocation of self acceptance, gratitude or self love?
What intention can you set to invite in greater ease and love to your relationship with your body?
THE QUEEN OF CUPS
Queen of Cups is an invitation into the deepest inner chambers of our being. She is a party for one, and one alone, and moves the energy out of logic, rational thought into a place where the communion with self transcends language, thought or belief. She is an invitation into deep immersion, love and quiet. This is where true healing can be incepted, nurtured and held. There is where the body can be heard with clarity and non-judgement. Where the all parts of the self can be together as one.
She is also a reminder of surrender born of faith. If the Knight is adept at putting one foot in front of the other, the Queen does not need certainty to place her foot. She does so from a space of deep love and trust, in knowing she has the capacity the bring about healing and wellness.
Where do you feel pain or discomfort in your body? If you can withdraw into a place of inner quiet and stillness, can you hear what your body is trying to communicate to you? Can you hear the remedies for what ails you?
IN CONNECTION AND COLLABORATION
Last week, I pulled The Lover and The Devil, with hints again to the phoenix rising. This week with the Knight and Queen unity and breaks with power come from a place of personal mastery, of being in the body and what we individually do to hold ourselves in pain away from physical unity and the joy that comes with truly being in our body, rather than using and abusing our body as an invisible vehicle that move us through life.
Riot Act, Pearl Jam